Why do women cheat? There are a lot of answers to that question but those answers don’t matter. Cheating is wrong. It doesn’t matter who is doing it or what the reason is. Cheating on the person you’re with is cowardly. It destroys the trust in a relationship and once it’s been done, it can’t be taken back. If you’re unhappy enough in your relationship that cheating appears to be an option, leave the relationship. If you’re in a relationship and you develop feelings for someone other than the person you’re with, same deal. It’s simple yet there are a lot of people out there that don’t do it. Let’s take a look at ten of the most common reasons women cheat.
10: Lack of definition in a relationship.
For some women (and men) out there, the rules of a relationship have to be clearly spoken in order for them to obey them. While the woman in question may not have to hear “Don’t have sex with anyone else” she may at least have to hear that she is in an exclusive, committed relationship to feel loyal. A lack of definition in a relationship could simply mean that along you act that a couple and you may be under the impression you’re a couple, titles haven’t officially been given. While some may not feel this can be considered cheating, it can feel like it is and often, that’s all that really matters.
09: Feeling torn between two people.
I spoke to this one a bit in the introduction but it deserves a deeper look. It’s possible to have feelings for more than one person at the same time and that can be a confusing and frustrating experience, especially if the two people you have feelings for are different kinds of people. One might make you feel things the other doesn’t but the other might make you feel things the first doesn’t. Sometimes people cheat because they feel they are in love with two people and are scared to make the wrong decision not seeing that cheating is the worst decision to make of all.
08: Feelings of inadequacy in a relationship or a lack of security in the relationship.
If a woman is constantly scared that she isn’t good enough for her partner or doesn’t feel secure in her relationship, she might seek out someone she feels she’s more equally matched for. This is more than an issue of self esteem. A woman whose with a man far more successful than her in his personal or professional life may not understand why the man has chosen to be with her. That can impact how she views herself and her place in the relationship. Cheating with someone less successful can make her feel more comfortable and more secure although in the end, it could cost her what could be a great relationship with a great man.
07: Feeling unappreciated by a partner.
No one wants to feel like the person they’re with doesn’t appreciate them. Maybe the woman doesn’t feel her man is attracted to her anymore. Maybe the woman doesn’t feel her man enjoys her company anymore. If she meets a man who does seem to appreciate her more than the one she’s with, she may cheat even if she feels like she still loves the person she’s with. Of course it’s the wrong way to handle the situation. Cheating is never the right answer. Never. If you feel the person you’re with doesn’t appreciate you, tell them! Give them a chance to talk to you about it and give them a chance to change whatever it is that’s making you feel unappreciated. If you give them that chance and nothing changes, it’s up to you whether you stay or leave but cheating shouldn’t even be an option you entertain. If someone appreciates you the way the person you’re with doesn’t, leave the person you’re with for the one who appreciates you.
06: Sexual attraction to someone else.
All too often on lists like these ones, sexual attraction is left off, but it’s a big one. If a woman is attracted to a man she is just as likely to act on it given the chance as a man is. If it’s a mutual attraction despite the fact that the woman’s in a relationship, it could potentially lead to cheating, especially if alcohol is involved. Let’s be clear about something though. Alcohol is not an excuse. If a woman cheats when she’s drunk it’s reasonable to assume she’ll cheat when she’s sober. If she does things when she’s drunk (like have sex with other people) that she wouldn’t do when she’s sober, she should consider putting down the bottle as that’s not healthy behavior.
05: Boredom.
Women get bored just as much as men do. If a woman is feeling a lack of excitement in the bedroom she may cheat just for the thrill of doing something she’s not supposed to be doing. Being bad is appealing. It’s exciting. There are ways to keep things exciting though. Try to avoid falling into a rut with the same old sex in the same old positions every night. Try out different ways of keeping the relationship fresh but remember above all else, when someone cheats they and they alone are to blame. It was their decision to stray instead of being a mature adult and talking about the situation.
04: Attention.
If a woman feels ignored by her partner she might cheat just to get that partner to pay her a little attention. It’s like a child who acts out because they can’t tell the difference between positive and negative attention. Some people never learn the difference. Being ignored doesn’t feel great but, not to beat a dead horse here, cheating isn’t the solution. Talking is.
03: Revenge.
Cheat on the person who cheated on you. You had sex with that pretty girl from the bar? I’ll have sex with that cute guy from the gym. It’s terribly flawed logic and can only lead to hurt, resentment and bitterness but all too often, cheating is how women (and men) get back at the person who cheated on them.
02: Lack of a solid moral foundation.
By a certain age, women and men should really know the difference between right and wrong. For some people though, that difference just isn’t all that well defined. Someone without a good moral code may not really care what cheating is wrong and might be more inclined to do it just for the thrill. While they might know it’s wrong, they might just not care. They could cheat with someone in a position of power to advance their career. They may cheat with someone that has something they want. They may even cheat to blackmail the person they’re cheating with later.
01: Lack of self esteem.
Sadly for a lot of women who cheat, the core reason isn’t problems in the relationship or anything like that. It’s a lack of self esteem. Being wanted and desired can make a woman feel good. It makes them feel more attractive or just better about themselves in general. For some women, that feeling is enough. Others, however, don’t know how to say no. They don’t know the difference between being flattered by someone’s attention and feeling attracted to someone. These women need to find their confidence in themselves before they’re really able to settle into a happy, committed relationship.
