Dating can be scary, especially after a long relationship. Here are some tips you can’t live without about dating after a long term relationship.
40-50% of marriages end in divorce. If you find yourself on the market after a long relationship, it can be confusing and scary. Dating after a long term relationship can feel like trying to walk a tight rope with a sea of sharks circling beneath you.
Learning how to start dating again after a long relationship before you go out on a date can help you avoid simple and embarrassing mistakes. Continue reading this article to learn what to do when starting to date again.
Dating After a Long Term Relationship – Pay Attention
If you think dating is like writing a bike, it doesn’t work that way. Things have changed and you need to know how to act when you get back out there.
What You Shouldn’t Do When Dating
Since what you shouldn’t do when you’re dating is even more important than what you should do, we’re going to start there. One major misstep can cause serious problems and you don’t want that.
Don’t Talk About the Ex
While your wound might still feel like an open one, you don’t want to talk about it. At least, you shouldn’t talk about your ex if you want the date to go well. If you want to bomb the date then talking about exes is the best way to do that.
You have a lot of stories that involve your ex. You might feel as if you can’t talk about a certain part of your life because they are in the stories, but you can still talk about those experiences without including interactions with your ex.
Don’t Fart and Burp
We hope that you wouldn’t do this in public or on a date, but it is worth saying. Farting and burping in front of your dates is not a good idea. Most people find it offensive and often aren’t going to be excited about a second date if you do it.
If you feel a bubble coming on, excuse yourself to the bathroom and do what you need to do there. If you’re having major stomach issues, it is better to excuse yourself and reschedule for another day.
Don’t Give Too Many Details
During your date, don’t give too many details when they ask you a question. It is easy to get excited about a topic in your life and talk for twenty minutes, but don’t go too far.
If you’re at a unique date venue, talk about something other than you by using it as a conversation starter. Giving your date too many details, in the beginning, can scare them away.
While you shouldn’t be evasive, you shouldn’t overshare. If they ask you what your favorite band is, you don’t have to go in-depth on why they are the best.
What You Should Do When Dating
Now that we’ve got dating don’ts out of the way, what should you do? Follow the tips below and you’ll be on the way to successful dating.
Ask Lots of Questions
Find out about the other person. Be curious. Let them know you’re interested.
You shouldn’t grill them, but you do want to ask questions to get them talking. Follow up questions are the best because it lets them know you were listening and it doesn’t feel so much like an interrogation.
If you aren’t sure what type of questions to ask, think about some things you would like them to ask you. The chances are if you ask the question, they will answer and then ask you the same question. Don’t ask questions you don’t want them to ask you.
Get Back in Touch With Single Friends
When you get into a relationship, you usually stop hanging out with your single friends. You don’t have anything against them. You still like them, but you are in different places in life.
Now you’re in the same place in life again – single and dating. Getting back in touch with your single friends will allow you to get a finger on the pulse of dating life. Ask your friends what to expect and see what advice they have.
You’re likely to find they have favorite venues for getting dates. Besides being good wingmen or good wingwomen, their friendships can be helpful if you have some lonely nights.
Check Out Online Dating
Whether you want to have a casual encounter or you’re looking for a life long mate, online dating can be a great way to get back out there. There are different types of dating sites so make sure the kind of site you’re on before you put your profile on there.
There are casual dating sites, long term relationship seekers and even niche dating sites like Christian and various nationalities.
Find a New Hobby
Finding a new hobby will allow you to get out and meet new people. If you find a hobby that you enjoy and you meet someone there, this can be a healthy way to organically grow a relationship with someone that enjoys the same thing.
Don’t get a new hobby only to meet people. If you don’t really like doing whatever it is that you’re doing, that isn’t going to go well if you meet someone and they think you like the same things.
There’s No Need to Rush
When you’re dating, there is no need to rush your relationship. You don’t need to get yourself on the track to marriage right away. If you rush relationships, it isn’t likely to go well so give yourself and the other person some time.
More Relationship Help
It’s okay if you still don’t feel ready to start dating after a long term relationship. Sometimes it is just too early for you and you shouldn’t feel pressured. If you feel pressured instead of prepared, your date might not go so well.
Do you want to continue to learn about having a great relationship? Read through our relationship articles today to grow your education on how to have a healthy relationship.
