In our modern society it seems like relationships fall apart faster than ever before. However, just because 40% of all marriages in the US fail, doesn’t mean it’s impossible to have a healthy relationship with the man you love. By following these five simple steps, you too can have a strong, healthy relationship that will stand the test of time.
I’m not saying that it will be all plain sailing, but if you want to keep your relationship in a healthy state then you are going to have to put the effort it. Some of I things we mention may seam like common sense, so its interesting to see that the same problems keep cropping up in relationships again and again.
Step 1: Affection
It should go without saying that being properly affectionate towards your spouse is the most important step in maintaining a healthy relationship. Everybody, male and female, craves affection. If you don’t have affection in your relationship, chances are your partner is going to go looking elsewhere to find it, and lets be honest you don’t really want that to happen. That doesn’t mean you need to jump each other at any available opportunity, but do make sure to regularly show your partner how much you care about them, be it through physical contact, gifts, or simply by telling them you love them on a regular basis. There can be a tendency as a relationship matures to start to neglect the level of intimacy that made the relationship so enjoyable in the beginning. Taking the time to be affection, warm and loving with your partner is rewarding in so many ways, and if he sees your making more of an effort. He will too!
Step 2: Understanding
In most relationships there comes a time when your partner begins to show signs of an obsession with something you just don’t care about. Whether that something is sports, video games, model railways, work or dungeons and dragons, the key to maintaining your happiness together is to show understanding and let them get on with it. There is no rule that says couples have to do everything together and completely share the same interests. If your partner has a fixation with something that is not unhealthy for him or your relationship, then let him enjoy it. Furthermore, why not enjoy the time to have fun with your hobby?
Step 3: Communication
Most experts will agree that communication between partners is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. Unfortunately this isn’t always easy to do. Most men don’t like to talk about their feelings, even fewer like talking about problems they may be facing in their life. Establishing a good flow of communication early into a relationship is the easiest way to make sure problems don’t arise later on. If your partner doesn’t like talking about the hard stuff, be subtle and slow in your approach for getting them to open up, over time things will become easier as they fall into the habit of discussing problems that one or both of you are facing. Any marriage and relationship councillor will tell you most problems could be solved with any relationships with better communication. Whilst it seams like a simple thing to do, when you fall into bad habits within your relationship such as bottling up your feelings, they can be hard to shake. Make every effort to keep clear channels of communication within your relationship, if you want it to remain in healthy!
Step 4: Support
Another word for relationship is partnership. To have a working partnership there needs to be a good level of support for everyone involved. It doesn’t matter whether this support takes on a physical form, an emotional form, a financial form or something else. They key is making sure that you are both willing and able to support each other in your day to day lives. That doesn’t mean you have to automatically agree with you partner on everything (in fact that’s highly unlikely to happen), just that you should try and show them your support whenever it is possible. Its also important to allow yourself to accept support from your partner.
If your used to being very independent it may take you a while to learn to look to your partner for support. But that is one of the beautiful aspects of being in a relationship, having someone to lean on and seek advice from who has your best intentions. What’s more men like to feel valued within a relationship as much as women, and when your comfortable about leaning on your partner for support, it makes him feel comfortable to do the same.
Step 5: Compromise
Finally there are going to be times when you don’t agree with something your partner wants to do. Couples argue all the time, that’s ok, if done properly it can be a very cathartic experience for both parties. Just remember, neither of you should get your own way all the time. Making sure to compromise on contentious issues in a way that satisfies both of you, is the best way to make sure your relationship remains strong and healthy for many years to come. It can be hard to compromise when you think you are right, or think you partner is making a poor choice but a relationship without compromise is destined to fail. There has to be a certain amount of give and take within any relationship between two individuals. The true test of the relationship is how accommodating you can be towards each other differences.