Parenting isn’t always easy. Children misbehave for a number of reasons, and often act in ways we parents can’t always understand. Sometimes, trying to guide your children in the right directions in life can feel like a frustrating and exhausting experience.
As much as you love your kids, and cherish the moments you spend together, you might find yourself wishing there was a way to make your job as a parent a little easier from time to time.
Fortunately, there are a handful of solutions to help you tackle the most common challenges caregivers face on a daily basis.
Let’s take a closer look.
1. Be Clear with Expectations
Children need absolute clarity when it comes to understanding how they’re expected to behave, and why you need them to act in a certain way. Telling your child they’re doing something “bad” but not explaining why will often lead to experimentation, as children are naturally curious creatures.
If you’re clear about why you want certain things from your child, and why it’s beneficial to them, they’re more likely to follow your guidelines. It also helps to be clear about the consequences of not following the rules. That doesn’t mean there can’t be room for compromise and negotiation in some cases, but it’s important to give your kids guidelines to work with.
For instance, rather than saying, “Don’t speak over me”, say “Interrupting people is bad manners, and it might hurt the feelings of other people.”
2. Share Control
Nobody likes feeling like they’re being pushed around and constantly told what to do. As a parent, you do have the right to tell your child what they should be doing to a certain extent. However, if your child feels like they’re constantly forced to obey abstract rules, this will often lead to rebellious behavior. To stop this from happening, try sharing some control.
Think about the behaviors and things in life you can compromise on, and how you can use those opportunities to give your kids a sense of independence. For instance, if your child hates eating vegetables, you could allow them to avoid certain kinds of vegetables or eat a specific amount of vegetables with each meal and leave the rest.
When children feel like they’re being given a choice, they’re more likely to respect and understand when a parent asks for something with absolute certainty.
3. Use Technology to Your Advantage
Technology can be a worrying concept for a lot of parents. Children are spending more time on the internet, social media, and their smartphones than ever before. While these devices allow for access to worlds of information, knowledge, and community, they can also be dangerous. Around 70% of children say they encounter violent and inappropriate content online, often when they’re only researching for homework.
Since watching over your child’s shoulder every time they are online isn’t appropriate, or possible in most cases, you’ll need to leverage your own technology to your advantage. AI-powered tools like FamilyKeeper can keep you aware of any worrisome behavior patterns for children online.
The app can detect online bullying, encounters with cyber predators, and offer insights into when your children might be engaging in dangerous activities on social networks. This makes it easier for you as a parent to supervise your child’s activity in a subtle way and know when you need to step in and say something.
4. Reject the Issue, not the Child
When something does happen that you disapprove of, it’s important not to place negative associations on the child. For instance, if your child spends too much time on their phone and displays signs of social media addiction, it’s not a good idea to tell them that using their phone makes them a bad person. Instead, you need to focus on why what they’re doing is bad.
Talk to the child about why certain actions and behaviors are bad, and make sure they know that you still love them and are acting because you want to protect them. Taking the right approach when things go wrong means your children are more likely to want to communicate with you when they’re facing a problem, or dealing with something difficult, rather than hiding their behavior.
Parenting is Never Easy
Parenting is a complex and challenging task which requires constant learning from any caregiver. As you grow with your child, you’ll find ways to enhance your parenting skills. However, for the meantime, follow the steps above, and remember to give yourself a break when you’re less than perfect. Parenting isn’t easy.
