A few days ago, I posted an article about weird laws. While putting the article together, I noticed a surprising amount of states have laws forbidding men with mustaches kissing women in public. While I’m sure these laws are no longer enforced if they ever were but it got me to thinking all the same. History has given us some pretty awesome mustaches. Let’s take a look at ten men who gave us some of the most famous mustaches ever.
10: Ron Jeremy
So maybe Ron Jeremy’s mustache isn’t the most famous thing on his body, but it’s definitely famous. Just look at that thing. It looks so wrong but so right at the same time. While there are things Ron is more well known for, it’s impossible to deny the impact his mustache has had on pop culture. The porno ‘stache is a thing and it’s a thing Ron Jeremy helped put on the map.
09: Ned Flanders
Ned Flanders and his mustache are just as much a part of Simpsons legend as Homer’s nearly entirely bald head and Marge’s blue beehive. While we’ve seen Ned without his trademark a time or two it always seems wrong and completely out of place. Imagine if he decided to shave off the old soup strainer for good? There would be such an uproar. Ned’s mustache is almost a character in and of itself.
08: Albert Einstein
Albert Einstein is one of the greatest minds that has ever lived. The work he did changed the world. There’s no denying that. There’s also no denying that Albert has a seriously epic mustache which worked pretty well with his truly epic hairstyle. It’s like a fuzzy white caterpillar took up residence under his nose. That mustache is such a part of the image that comes to mind when one pictures Einstein, it’s hard to imagine him without it.
07: Alex Trebek
Remember when Alex decided to shave off his trademark mustache? There was such a huge public outcry one has to wonder if he ever considered growing it back just to shut people up. Alex’s mustache was just as much a part of Jeopardy as Alex himself. While it could be argued that he looked a bit younger and even more distinguished without it, Alex just wasn’t the same once the mustache was gone. While people adjusted and the world continued turning, it felt like a somewhat less magical place after the shaving.
06: Tom Selleck
Oh come on! How could I have a top ten famous mustaches list without Magnum? Not possible. Nearly blasphemous. Tom has turned his mustache into a trademark. He’s nearly unrecognizable without it. Perhaps that hasn’t been a great thing for his career considering when I think of Tom, I think of that lip fuzz more than any of the actual work he’s done but taking a glance over his resume, it’s pretty obvious he hasn’t done that badly for himself at all.
05: Charlie Chaplin
So maybe there was a historical figure a bit well known for the toothbrush mustache Charlie Chaplin first made famous but I can’t seem to recall who that historical figure is. Okay, that’s a lie but I’d much rather write about Charlie and it’s my freaking list. Charlie was a legend of the silent film era and that mustache is part of the image everyone remembers when they remember him. Would he have been as successful with a bare upper lip? Probably but who cares? Charlie was awesome and so is his mustache. The end.
04: Hulk Hogan
I’m sorry but my good heavens – Hulk Hogan is such a fantastically unattractive man mustache and all. The very idea that men copied this mustache amazes me, but I suppose I can sort of see the appeal. It definitely stands out and makes a statement. It’s a very “look at me” sort of style – even if people aren’t looking at you for the right reasons. Hulk took facial hair and made it iconic. And to think, simply growing in the hair on his chin would’ve made it typical and ordinary. For better of for worse, Hulk was definitely a trendsetter with this one.
03: Yosemite Sam
How could I not include Yosemite Sam on this list? That freaking mustache is iconic, even if it is animated. Granted everything about Yosemite is iconic, but especially that mustache. Just look at it. If Yosemite were a real person, that mustache would cause the poor bugger so many problems. He’d be stepping on it all the time. Forget about a little food in your mustache. Imagine what would get all tangled up in that sucker!
02: Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx had one of the most legendary mustaches and I refuse to listen to anyone who tries to claim otherwise. While it started out as just grease paint he wore as part of his act, he wound up growing a real mustache he continued wearing until he died. Need proof its iconic? Just look to those one piece costume masks featuring the glasses, fake nose and mustache. They’re a direct nod to Groucho’s famous facial hair.
01: Fu Manchu
Hard to believe that when the Fu Manchu character was originally written, he did not have his trademark mustache. This wasn’t a character with a fu manchu. This was a character named fu manchu that had a mustache – a mustache turned legend. Said mustache not only became a trademark for the character but spawned a whole new style of facial hair worn by people around the world. This style became known as the fu manchu even though many, many people who wore it (and even many people who wear it now) have no idea where the style or even the name came from.
